


How To Train Your Agents

by sassyfangs13



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-31
Updated: 2012-07-31
Packaged: 2017-11-11 03:26:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/473989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sassyfangs13/pseuds/sassyfangs13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Natasha has to teach the newest Shield recruits how to defend themselves and Clint has to help.</p>
            </blockquote>





	How To Train Your Agents

     Natasha paced across the front of the room, arms behind her, shoulders back, chest out, chin up. She had mastered the "intimidating yet incredibly sexy" state of being and the new recruits had taken notice, along with Clint in the back of the room. It was Natasha's job to greet the newest agents, Clint didn't know how she had gotten roped into it, probably because she was the most terrifying person on the helicarrier and Fury was out today.   
     "All of you have had some kind of training, probably military, and I'm here to tell you that won't get you very far here. The things you have to deal with on a day to day basis will not nice." She sounded so bored, Clint couldn't help but laugh. "They will not spare your life and sometimes they will not even be human. You're all with Shield now and need to learn how to fight like a Shield agent. You will need to be fast, you will need to be clever, you will need to train at least two hours every day. Your first few months are going to be hell, you will be trained to be the best, that is why you are here. If the program is too much for you to handle you will not stay on this aircraft and you will not be given a free ride home. Let's get started with some basics. It seems that all of my usual volunteers are out today so, Agent Barton, if you could join me at the front of the room." He recollected his thoughts and walked to the front to stand by the Black Widow, he wasn't exactly unconcerned about his near future wellbeing.   
     "Agent Barton is going to help me show you all which areas to attack on the human body that create the biggest impact with the least amount of force. In the event of a frontal assault..." she gestured for him to step towards her. He took one step and she struck, his vision filled with blinding white pain. He grabbed his nose and turned away, hearing hisses of empathetic pain from the room of recruits.   
     "Use the heel of your hand and thrust it upward. This will cause the nose to break and the assailant's eyes to tear giving you a chance to attack again. Now, let's say your attacker comes from behind..." She turned her back to Clint and waited for him to approach. He hesitated but did so against his better judgement, looping his arms around her shoulders and waist. She tossed him off her back and onto the floor just in front of the first row of chairs.  
     "Use their momentum and energy against them, this will give you more time to figure out a counterattack. If neither of these are an option go for the four most sensitive parts of the body." She motioned for Clint to get back up and approach her again. Why was he doing this?  
     Natasha straightened her hand and plunged it into his stomach just under his ribs, "The solar plexus." She drove a heel into his foot and he was fairly certain he heard something break, "The instep." Groans of pain came from both Clint and the recruits with each hit. An elbow slammed into his nose, if it wasn't broken before then it certainly was now. "The nose and finally..."  
     "Tasha." Clint warned, grabbing his bleeding nose.  
     "The groin." She kicked her foot up and hit him in the balls. He didn't know how she did it with so much style, like a proper Bond villain, but that wasn't the most pressing matter at the moment.   
     "Are we done now?" Clint asked quietly, doubled over and keeping his balance with a nearby chair. She nodded and he tried to keep as much dignity as he could by not limping out of the room.   
     "A hand for the incredibly durable Mr. Barton." Natasha clapped a couple times herself as the recruits applauded him out of the room. Twenty minutes later there was a small knock on his door.  
     "Come in." He must have sounded awful, the bleeding handy stopped yet and he couldn't breathe through his nose. Natasha entered the small room, an apologetic smile on her bright red lips.   
     "Let me see it." He put down the blood stained cloth and she examined his swollen purple nose. "It's broken--"  
     "Thanks, I got that part."  
     "I'm going to have to pop it back in. Ready?" He nodded and gripped the table. "One...two--"  
     "Motherfucker!" Clint shouted, holding his nose. "What ever happened to counting to three? That wasn't even two."  
     "Hurts less when you don't expect it."  
     "Like hell..."  
     "How's the rest of you?"  
     "Well, I had to ice my crotch for ten minutes. That was fun, still hurts. I think you broke my foot and I'll have bruises on my chest and back but otherwise I'm totally cool." Natasha laughed and pulled his shirt up. He was right, two large bruises were forming on his back and chest. There wasn't much she could do for those. She grabbed a scanner off the wall and swiped it over his foot.   
     "Nothing is broken, you'll be fine." She gave him a kiss on the cheek, not wanting to interfere with the excessive amounts of blood that had finally stopped coming from his broken nose. "Let's get you cleaned up, hmm?" 

**Author's Note:**

> For the prompt: Tasha is doing a Miss Congeniality style demonstration for a group of new Shield agents, Barton is her demonstration partner. She patches him up afterwards.


End file.
